i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
So much Jack, so little girl.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
