You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
