I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
