worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
