plz talk dirty to me
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
