i wish my penis had a tongue
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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