I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
