obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
We have started to decorate penises.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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