i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.