I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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