I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
