We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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