so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
