its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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