That's intense
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
