I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
