Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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