I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
