Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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