apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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