oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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