Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
