I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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