there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
