thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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