We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
