wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
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