Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
