Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize
