Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
