I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
