Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize