you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
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