I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
