he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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