Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
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