What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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