who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
