Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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