is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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