So drunk its hurt
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
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haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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