i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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