You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Randomize
