The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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