I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
