dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
