It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Hippo gnu deer
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
