: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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