btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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