what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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