your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
